We are a commune of inquiring, skeptical, politically centrist, capitalist, anglophile, traditionalist New England Yankee humans, humanoids, and animals with many interests beyond and above politics. Each of us has had a high-school education (or GED), but all had ADD so didn't pay attention very well, especially the dogs. Each one of us does "try my best to be just like I am," and none of us enjoys working for others, including for Maggie, from whom we receive neither a nickel nor a dime. Freedom from nags, cranks, government, do-gooders, control-freaks and idiots is all that we ask for.
There are (at least) two kinds of tantrums: irrational volcanic explosions and manipulative tantrums. Spanking does not work for the former, but works for the latter. The problem is that the kids know to mainly have the latter in public places, like in supermarkets. They know what they are doing.
What works best for older kids, like college students with tantrums?
My daughter was a sensitive kid. I knew that, and I understood that routine was big for her. So I tried to stick to routine as much as possible - bed times, feeding times, drop off routines, etc.
Not every trick works for every kid. If I had asked how big a problem something was, I think they ALL would've been huge problems to her. LOL.
What worked for me was any 'meltdown' was typically related to overly tired kid at a party or playground or other fun thing. So I'd give warnings of time: We have to leave in ten minutes, so if you want to go down the slide a few more times, you might want to do it now. Then, I'd give another warning: Just a few more minutes, and it will be time to leave.
This really helped mitigate the breakdowns. Sure, she would be sad she was leaving the fun, but it went a lot more smoothly. Who wants to be 'surprised' and yanked out of a fun situation with no warning?
We also never had problems with loud, bratty kids at a restaurant b/c we taught them in babyhood (kids are NOT stupid) - maybe 4, 5, 6 months old - what was acceptable behavior in a store or restaurant. No yelling, vocalizing, whining, etc. Bring plenty of distractions - coloring books, small toys, etc. - and all will be well.
If you really want to change this, require they perform community service. For the first offense, give them 500 hours of community service to be served within 7 months of sentencing. Any hours missed double. No privileges (for college students that means no college) until the community service is completed, unless the individual is complying with the community service work requirements, no exceptions without medical need. By community service, I mean working with the tree trimming crews in the parks, or litter patrolling the highways, or some other necessary work, not sitting in a rubber room.
The second offense doubles the hours to 1,000 which must be completed within 14 months. A third, 2,000 hours to be served within 28 months.
Back when I was mid 20s, I worked industrial demolition work, during one project I worked 15 months, either 12 or 13 hour every day. Twelve hours per day equals 84 hour per week. Thirteen hours equals 91 hours per week. I was paid well, but this was hard work, over long hours. It made an indelible impression.
The punishment above would require about 2.4 hours of work each day. Or, if the tantrum thrower decided he would rather work just weekends he could work 8.4 hours of work each week end day.
This is sufficiently onerous to leave an impression.
When modified, this works very well, plus you obtain productive work out of the individual, and they gain the personal respect of having done a good job at something.